New Shoes... Woot!

New Shoes by Gender Crush on Polyvore.com

Ordered these heels from jessicabennettshoes.com
I've been looking at them for close to a year. Ya, I know, why wait? I saved over $100 that's why. I'm always looking and I've grown past purchasing generic heels. What I mean is that instead of buying several meh heels, I'd rather save up and buy the real gems. At least the ones I like the most. Next stop. Boots!!!

Shoes first... Bills later

I'm going positively nuts with my wants versus needs. There's a ton things I need to do in my life due to responsibilities and obligations. I work all the time and the personal rewards I give myself is usually a smoothie or a case of Sam Adams. Anyways. If I could buy one extra indulgence in life it has to be shoes and damn you if your thinking about that YouTube video. ^_^

sunlight through the breeze

Getting back to zen. I've finished some school projects and accepted the big ones into my life. Surprisingly I take more enjoyment in my internship than my day job. Another thing going for me is that I'm riding my bike more. The Misses and I bought some road bikes last year to participate in a JDRF fund raise. That aside I do enjoy getting away from my computer. The resulting affect from my outdoor activity is that I'm more hungry and fidgety. I hope it's my metabolism kicking up a notch.
The other reason could be one of my co workers just quit. This wake up call reminds me I don't have to drive 50 miles a day for a decent wage. The down side to this. I'm picking up the slack.
Back to bicycle riding. I would love to ride more often. It's something my Dad passed on to me. I grew up with his cycling passion. We don't live close enough to do weekend rides, but in the future I hope we can.

Moaning Mondays

I find it funny that I'm never satisfied of who I am...for at least now. My addiction to Flickr is testament to that. I escape to many points of the world seeing the lives of others doing what they do. A transidentalist at heart. I find myself envious to the point of depression. I know I'm this is affecting me more because of where I work, what social standards I have to keep up and ALL the college work I have to complete. The sad thing is I don't like the job I have...but it pays. I don't like what I have to wear...but it keeps from being lynched. I don't give two flying asshats the degree I'm pursuing...but I get to finish this year vs. 3 years from now. I'm damned either way. Why the hell am I doing in this life just to get by? I know I'm Love my Wife, Family, and Friends, but it's really hard to love myself. I guess I'll keep pressing on like always.

Normalcy in my making

Besides focusing on my main distraction in life I will say I have other passions that I enjoy. Most of the time they're put on hold due to my incessant college requirements. Well this past weekend I had free to enjoy some good times with the wife and friends. Friday started out slow. I played house keeper and no I don't have a french maid outfit...yet. Ha! I did however enjoy picking up the slack in chores. I feel guilty when she takes on more house duties and I'm left shilling paper after paper. Anywho. We ended up watching the movie Penelope staring Christina Ricci and James McAvoy. Good date night movie.

On Saturday I spent my free time messing with my garage. Too much crap that I need to sort out. Also, note to self. Do stuff in the garage during Spring and Fall. It's too freaking hot and humid. Later that night we went to St Louis to meet up with some friends and dance to 3am at new 80s/Britpop venue. I must have danced my freaking head off that night because the next morning my feet were killing me. Chuck All Stars do not take the best impact for my rug cutting skills.
Sunday I recovered by continueing my Fringe series on Hulu.com and slapping an ice pack. Knowing we had to be somewhere at 5 we ended going to the grociery store. Funny thing lately is I really have no idea what I want to eat these days. At home at least. This little habit isn't helping the bank balance.
To end this long weekend we met up with more friends at Grant's Trail 16 miles total ride. Always good to get back on the road bike. I really enjoy doing things like this.

Dreading Support Groups

In my corner of the world you will always come across support groups. Those that encourage expressing your thoughts. I've never been drawn to them. It feels like a despiration move, but in the end I think it may be what I need the most.. The funny thing is that it isn't going to be just about the fashion. Lately I've been feeling like the really odd ball of life. I'm nerd, geek, otaku, whatever you want to say. I just don't have many kindred souls I can connect with. I do have a wonderful wife but I can't shoot the shit about CD fashion. That subject isn't discussed casually at home or anywhere for that fact. My coworker artificialy rant about their sports and lifes war stories. I would say something but I have no energy talk to the back stabbers. Yes I would like some cheese with my wine.

My choice or is it Man choice?

The wife asked me to join her for business lunch with potential client. I was only meant to be the muscle in case this person was a sketchy character. We'll I didn't bring much entertainment so as we waited for this I guy I grabbed a couple magazines. Lo behold out of the stack to choose from there was only two "male" centric choices. Everything else was either home, Hollywood or fashion. Well I go for what I like and she makes the comment that I had to pick girl magazines. Once again I'm restricted to be who I am. I understand I loose out on man point by looking at this and if this guy we were about to meet was any threat then his first impression of me would be belittling. I'm just once again force by these roles in order maintain balance in the cosmos.