Moaning Mondays

I find it funny that I'm never satisfied of who I am...for at least now. My addiction to Flickr is testament to that. I escape to many points of the world seeing the lives of others doing what they do. A transidentalist at heart. I find myself envious to the point of depression. I know I'm this is affecting me more because of where I work, what social standards I have to keep up and ALL the college work I have to complete. The sad thing is I don't like the job I have...but it pays. I don't like what I have to wear...but it keeps from being lynched. I don't give two flying asshats the degree I'm pursuing...but I get to finish this year vs. 3 years from now. I'm damned either way. Why the hell am I doing in this life just to get by? I know I'm Love my Wife, Family, and Friends, but it's really hard to love myself. I guess I'll keep pressing on like always.

Normalcy in my making

Besides focusing on my main distraction in life I will say I have other passions that I enjoy. Most of the time they're put on hold due to my incessant college requirements. Well this past weekend I had free to enjoy some good times with the wife and friends. Friday started out slow. I played house keeper and no I don't have a french maid outfit...yet. Ha! I did however enjoy picking up the slack in chores. I feel guilty when she takes on more house duties and I'm left shilling paper after paper. Anywho. We ended up watching the movie Penelope staring Christina Ricci and James McAvoy. Good date night movie.

On Saturday I spent my free time messing with my garage. Too much crap that I need to sort out. Also, note to self. Do stuff in the garage during Spring and Fall. It's too freaking hot and humid. Later that night we went to St Louis to meet up with some friends and dance to 3am at new 80s/Britpop venue. I must have danced my freaking head off that night because the next morning my feet were killing me. Chuck All Stars do not take the best impact for my rug cutting skills.
Sunday I recovered by continueing my Fringe series on Hulu.com and slapping an ice pack. Knowing we had to be somewhere at 5 we ended going to the grociery store. Funny thing lately is I really have no idea what I want to eat these days. At home at least. This little habit isn't helping the bank balance.
To end this long weekend we met up with more friends at Grant's Trail 16 miles total ride. Always good to get back on the road bike. I really enjoy doing things like this.

Dreading Support Groups

In my corner of the world you will always come across support groups. Those that encourage expressing your thoughts. I've never been drawn to them. It feels like a despiration move, but in the end I think it may be what I need the most.. The funny thing is that it isn't going to be just about the fashion. Lately I've been feeling like the really odd ball of life. I'm nerd, geek, otaku, whatever you want to say. I just don't have many kindred souls I can connect with. I do have a wonderful wife but I can't shoot the shit about CD fashion. That subject isn't discussed casually at home or anywhere for that fact. My coworker artificialy rant about their sports and lifes war stories. I would say something but I have no energy talk to the back stabbers. Yes I would like some cheese with my wine.